Tuesday, May 16, 2017

A Negative Rambling...

Hello. I hope you're having a great day or week, life, whatever. lol Ugh, I really hate the fact that I haven't been able to come here so often compared to what my situation was a few months ago! I have been failing to upload even once a week, and I hate it. I don't really like being busy (I sometimes do... Only sometimes...), and I don't like people who almost brag about how busy they are either. What I'm trying to tell you though, is that I've been busy! So ironic.

Well, job hunting is supposed to be the time when you meet different people, get to know different industries/companies, search for your future career path (i.e., your "bright" future!), etc., and it should be uplifting. But I feel like I'm at the other end of the emotion scale; I'm depressed, basically. Other people may be imagining their future selves, and thinking how wonderful their lives can/will be. Joy of life? Not for me, really. I feel like my life is draining. Haha, that was kind of an exaggeration. 

Alright, today's post doesn't have any topic or theme or whatsoever. I just wanted to sit and write. ...Write about me being pessimistic. lol It's not like I'm sad; I'm just pessimistic. And being pessimistic and being sad are different. And I'm not mad or angry either. No, I don't feel anger. You could ask me if I'm happy. The answer is, to be honest, I don't know. I don't really know what happiness is, to begin with. If you cannot define happiness, then you cannot tell whether you're happy or not, right? I know, happiness is a state of mind, and everyone has their own definitions of happiness. Some people may define being rich, and having an abundance of money as happiness, whereas others may value different things. But in the first place, you cannot define happiness so easily. There are different and many factors that can affect happiness (e.g., money, human relationship, environment, etc.), and I think it's the combination of these various factors that people refer to when they try to define what happiness is. So, then, I guess that in a way, happiness is your life goal, and if your current situation is somewhat close to your life goal (i.e., what you want and what you want to be), then you're happy. 

Ok, now I'm going to make a new paragraph because nobody likes big, long and dull paragraphs. So, if you desire to know whether you're happy, you need to have a goal, at least. And I think I am having a (major) problem here. Currently, I don't have a goal. I'm not really sure what I want, what I want to achieve, what kind of person I want to be, etc. The more I learn, and the more I read, the more I'm confused. I want to reach out to the truth (if there's any), but it's like trying to catch smoke. I can't be sure about anything. 

Hmm, I guess I'll just stop writing here for today. My writing spirit(s) went away, and doesn't seem to come back anytime soon. Thanks for reading this depressing post if you happened to make it this far! See you next time! 

Friday, May 5, 2017

Animal Farm by George Orwell

Hi! It's been two weeks since I last posted... But this was not because I was busy, to be honest. I had much time especially the last weekend of April and the first few days of this month. But I had been out of my house, and spent time doing different things which aren't worth mentioning here. lol

To tell the truth, I am so glad that I didn't quite blogging. I say this because I'm really bad at keeping a journal. At first, I never fail to open my notebook at night, and write a few paragraphs or so, but unfortunately, this good habit doesn't live long in my life. I have tried to keep a journal several times throughout my short lifetime (It's an ongoing process, of course; I don't have any plan to pass away at this point.), but none of the trials ended successfully. Well, in the first place, think about it. I wouldn't have to have my own blog if I were a capable person who makes journal entry everyday. What I write here are merely my soliloquies. The only difference is that whether the writings are public or private.

Ok, so that was my casual talks before I get right into business. lol As it says on the title, I am going to talk about a book called "Animal Farm" which was written by George Orwell. Yes, it is a fairy story about animals on a farmland, and yes, it may sound like a happy, peaceful story, but it is not. Oh, before I go in, please just let me remind you that I will reveal the basic outline of this story. If you do not wish to know anything about the story line, I have to suggest you to stop reading this post. Alright, so I read a copy of the book published from Penguin Books, and on the back of the book, it says:
"When the downtrodden animals of Manor Farm overthrow their master Mr Jones and take over the farm themselves, they imagine it is the beginning of a life of freedom and plenty. But as a cunning, ruthless elite among them starts to take control, other animals find themselves hopelessly ensnared as one form of tyranny is gradually replaced by another. Orwell's chilling 'fairy story' is a timeless and devastating satire of idealism betrayed be power and corruption." 
Yup, that's how basically the story goes. The animals on the farm were living a miserable life, and that was Mr. Jones and all other humans' fault, they thought. Or at least some of them strongly felt that way. Others were just not clever enough to think critically, and process their opinions, or just weren't that interested or enthusiastic, but took part in the rebellion as a result. Humans have been dominating their life, abusing them, and exploiting them, and they have come to think that they didn't have to let it be that way. And that ended up being a rebellion against humanity, and the couple who owned the farm (Mr. & Mrs. Jones) were exiled from their own farm.

Soon after the rebellion, the farm seemed to won peace and freedom. But it wasn't long before one specie (i.e., pigs) started to take a lead of the entire animals. They were doing all the "brain-works" for the animals and for the farm, and didn't engage in labor as much as other animals did. And among the pigs, two leaders emerged: Napoleon and Snowball. The two was always disagreeing with each other on every discussion. And the rest of the animals were mostly not clever enough to think which side to take, and they seemed to go with the one who was present in front of them and speaking. When Snowball was presenting his opinions, they thought he had a better idea; when Napoleon was preaching to them, they thought they should agree with him over Snowball.

But on day, to their surprise, Snowball was exiled by Napoleon, and Napoleon have come to become the sole leader of Animal Farm. From that time on, whenever bad things happened, Napoleon claimed that Snowball was the mastermind. You wouldn't really know whether Napoleon was correct, and Snowball was actually the bad guy behind the scene, but the pigs always found ways to convince their comrades. And now you already see the way the rebellion is headed. Now it's hard to see the goals and ideals that animals had imagined before and at the beginning of the rebellion.

There was a set of rules which was called "The Seven Commandments," and it was supposed to function like a constitution. The commandments were set right after the rebellion, and those were the rules upon which all animals should live. But the commandments were "adjusted" whenever the pigs wanted to, and the adjustments were always done at night when the farm is asleep. For example, one of the rules was: "No animals shall kill any other animal." But one day, Napoleon massacred animals who planned to set up him or had thoughts of treason against him by secretly allying with Snowball, in front of all the other animals. The next morning when they saw the commandments, it read: "No animal shall kill any other animal without cause." Of course, the animals do feel like something has been changed (The commandments are written on the wall with a white paint, and can be read from a distance.), but one of the pigs named Squealer who is really good at giving speeches and convincing people to believe what he says, always made sure to convince the animals that they had false memories by asking them, "Are you REALLY sure you didn't memorized it wrong? Can you prove that it was different before?"

There were many times when the animals didn't get enough food because of the harsh weather. But Squealer always reported them that they were having more harvest and food than previous years, which false statistics, but the animals couldn't tell the the reports were false because they couldn't really prove it, and the pigs knew it. Even during the hardest season, when the animals was starving and hadn't had enough food, the pigs and the dogs (i.e., the guard of the pigs) had plenty of food to eat.

In the end, the pigs had become just like human being, the ones toward whom they had the greatest hatred. They started sleeping in bed, wearing clothes, and drinking alcohol just like humans. When the animals witnessed the pigs partying with humans, they now couldn't really tell which was which. ...And that's the end of the story.

The book was published in 1945, and Orwell wrote this story to tell people the real situation of Soviet Union after the Russian Revolution. I am glad that I read this book since it's very alarming. From the third person's viewpoint, it is always clear that the rebellion is starting to head to a weird and dangerous direction, but the animals do not have ways to stop that even if they noticed that something was wrong. For them, it is impossible to point out the problem with full sentences, and they don't even know when and why exactly the rebellion went wrong. It just happened, and they had already become just a small fraction of the entire system and the events. The books was published more than 70 years ago, but the it doesn't sound like an old story from the past, which is surprising and frightening. This can really happen! And it is an important thing to keep in mind. Totalitarianism is not the story of savage, inferior countries of the past or far away from yours. It could happen anywhere, and yes, even today. I feel like more and more people have become aware of this, and been feeling cautious about our societies due to the current political situations we face today.

Again, I am really glad that I got the chance to read the book. I wanted to write about Orwell's life, but I won't at least in this post since it would take up too much space, and it's actually impossible to sum up his life in just a few sentences. I will just say that he had an extraordinary life.

Thank you for reading, and I hope to see you in my next post! Bye!