Thursday, December 14, 2017

Let's Talk about Freedom of Speech!

Hi! It's been really cold lately, and I'm having a very difficult time getting up and getting out of my bed every morning. Does anyone know how to get out of the bed during winter? lol Because I really need to know. I spend like 30 minutes or even longer in my bed every morning after the alarm went off because it's so cold! I do turn on the AC but still, being in my bed is way more comfortable than getting up. I wish I were more punctual and organized. I'm a lazy person by nature. lol I know I should get out of my comfort zone to make a change, and it's never easy to make a change, but as I said, I am a lazy person, and I'm too lazy to get out of my comfort zone. Ok, that was a joke... I hope it really was a joke... lol But if you have any tip or hack on how to get up smoothly every morning during winter, please let me know.

Alright, so today, I would like to talk about free speech. I am talking about this because lately, I feel like this really basic human right is in danger. Ah, I already hear some oppositions claiming what I have just said is untrue. We do not live in a world where freedom of speech is explicitly oppressed, like the world of 1984 by George Orwell.  Freedom of speech is protected by law. We will not be imprisoned by criticizing our government, and if that happens in the worst case, people will blame the government, because that is just so wrong. Most people believe that having the right to express our thoughts freely is very important. Free speech is in danger? Nah, I don't believe that.

What I want to say in this post is that we need to stop and think. ...And doubt. Do we really live in a world where free speech is supported and encouraged? Don't we feel like more and more people are avoiding discussions lately? Don't we feel like there's this atmosphere of "preferred opinions"? And if you are brave enough to go against this preferred opinion, you will be slammed. People do not just oppose your opinion; they will dehumanize you. They will start to look at you like you are a savage, and a cruel person. They don't just deny our opinion; they will deny you, and start to doubt your humanity.

Now, let's talk about things that happened (relatively) lately. Donald Trump was inaugurated as the new President of the United States in January. It may seem weird to say the inauguration happened only lately, but you know what I mean, right? lol I mean that it happened this year, not like 100 or 1000 years ago. During the time when he was fighting against his opponent, Hilary Clinton, a considerable amount of information about him and what he had done in the past was heard. People say he is a sexist, and also a racist.

Now, there could many reasons to support a candidate over another one. Maybe you like Candidate A's political policies better than those of Candidate B. Or maybe you choose to vote for Candidate A, even though you don't particularly support Candidate A, because you do not like Candidate B at all, and you think it would be better if Candidate A could get the position. You don't have to be an enthusiastic supporter of Candidate A to vote for Candidate A.

More that often, choosing is very difficult. Sometimes, you have to choose one, even if you don't like either of the choice. Choosing a choice over another doesn't always mean that you just adore every little detail or aspect of the choice you picked. Sometimes you need to go through hard decisions. But what happened during and even after the election campaign is the discrimination against Trump supporters. You cannot say that all Trump supporters are both sexist and racist as he is, and therefore, you cannot blame those who voted for Trump by labeling them as racists and sexists. You cannot say that they chose Trump because they are essentially a bad person. I am not a supporter of President Trump, so I am not saying this to defend myself. I'm just trying to be fair.

When you start labeling people like that, there's no meaningful discussion. You can have different views and opinions. And it's not the matter of which is right and which is wrong. I have heard that some students had experienced being assaulted because of their political views. Treating those who do not share the same view as being evil should ever be allowed.

I came across a video last month when I was scrolling down Facebook. Here's the link of the video: http://www.bbc.com/news/av/education-41837205/brexit-supporting-students-getting-abuse-on-campus The debate over whether the Britain should stay in EU or not was also a very hot topic. And in universities, the preferred opinion was: the Britain should stay. But of course, they were people who thought that the Britain should leave. And basically, people didn't like that. In the video, some students who supported the Leave Campaign share their experience of how they are discriminated and assaulted on campus by other students. They were called out simply because they didn't support the preferred opinion. They were told stupid, dumb, racist, xenophobic, etc. Once people have found out that they were Brexiteers, the friendly conversation is over, and people will treat them as their enemy, and start to doubt their humanity.

Now, let's talk about Japan. There have been a discussion over whether to change the ninth article of the Constitution of Japan. Basically, in the current version, the ninth article declares that Japan will pursue peace and justice, and therefore, Japan will not participate in war, and will not hold military power. Well, in Japan, we don't have any military, but we have the Self-Defense Force. The Self-Defense Force is not supposed to take a part in combats, at least for now.

Lately, some people are claiming the article needs to be changed or modified. Looking at the international tension between North Korea and Japan (and other countries), Japan needs to be able to defend itself when things happened. The Constitution went into effect 70 years ago, which means that it is old, and it is reasonable to think that modifications should be considered or made once in a while. These are what people who support the idea of modifying the article generally say, I think.

And of course, there are people who do not want to make any change. We live in Japan, the peaceful country. We have established our country's identity as the country that pursues peace. If we make changes to the article, that identity will fall down. Some people might even go so far as to say that the thought of making modifications to the article itself is evil.

Me? My take on this issue is: we should consider making modifications. The Constitution is 70 years old, and it's about the time we start reviewing it to see if it needs some modifications or not. And I think we need to redefine the Self-Defense Force. I know. It's the Constitution, the greatest law of our country, and I know that we can't just change things up so easily. That makes it even more reasonable to discuss this matter closely. Plus, I feel like many Japanese people stick to the idea of the peaceful country, Japan, not the idea or the concept of peace itself. We, the nation of Japan does not possess any military power. But on behalf of us, the military of the United States is supposed to protect Japan in case of emergency. So it's totally fine for American troops to fight for Japan on behalf of us, while we just sit at home? I think not many Japanese people think about this, and that's why I said many Japanese people just stick to the idea of the peaceful country, Japan, not the idea of peace itself. Right now, North Korea is doing whatever it pleases. And all Japan can do is blame.

But unfortunately, I'm not on the preferred-opinion side. I'm on the "wrong" side. So many people are quick to conclude that people who suggest modification are those with a dangerous thought. They would say, "What?! So you support war?" NO. I never support war and violence. It's not just me; other people who support making modifications do not support war and violence either. All I want to say is that we need to redefine peace once more. Let's think about peace. What is peace? Yes, we have not had any war since the end of WWII. But is it enough? Do you like the idea of peace? Or do you simply care about the idea of the peaceful country, Japan, only? I am not saying that we should change the Constitution so that we can start a war tomorrow. I'm a peace seeker. I take peace seriously. That's why I say that we should think about peace. It may not be a comfortable topic for a conversation, but we need to talk about it. It's easy to avoid this conversation by saying, "You know what? I'm a peace seeker. Modifying the Constitution sounds too radical, so let's play it safe, and leave it as it is." For me, the unwillingness to review the article is a sign of willingness to avoid the uncomfortable, not important topic, peace.

Not many people are willing to talk about this controversial in the first place, and saying that I suggest modification takes a lot of courage, because I know this is not the preferred opinion, and I know people will judge me for my opinion. But freedom of speech is very important, and no one should never feel that they are somehow oppressed to feel in a certain way. It's easy to speak up when there's the atmosphere of valuing free speech. But right now, it's not. I feel the importance of thinking for myself, and expressing my idea openly even more nowadays, because not many people are willing to do so. Freedom of speech is under threat, people! People had fought, and shed blood to gain this right. Let's not ruin this.

Thank you for reading! English is not my first language, and there are so many things I want to say, but more that often, my poor English skills (and my poor writing skill also?) interfere with them! lol I hope one day, I will be able to express my thought freely in English as well as Japanese, and never have to feel this way! Alright, so until next time! Bye!

Friday, November 10, 2017

On Being the Queen of Negative Feelings!

Hello, hello! The last time I posted was in September, and I did not post anything last month. I always write that I should post more, but I always end up not posting so much. Actually, I need to write blogs as many times as I can, because I will be graduating next March, and will start working full time from next April, which means that I'll probably be busy. It's not that I'm not busy now, though. lol

So, first, let me talk briefly about the book I just finished reading today. I was reading Treatise on Tolerance by Voltaire. It was published in 1763, more than 250 years ago, but the book still offers many important issues that need to be discussed. Indeed, "tolerance" is a very hot topic for the world today. Yes, tolerance is important. We should not attack people for having a different view or opinion from ours; we should accept them, or overlook them, even though we don't necessarily like what they are saying. But that is not always easy, and as a result, there have been numerous cases of conflict, persecution, massacre, etc., throughout history.

But we cannot just end our discussion by concluding that tolerance is important, and that we all need to be kind and nice to all kinds of different opinions, and accept them. Do we have to accept ALL kinds of opinions and views? Ok, so now this person is planning to start a religion that justifies murder. Do we need to overlook this kind of religion? Or are we allowed to be intolerant when certain things happened? If so, how can we decide when to be tolerant, and when not to be tolerant?

Voltaire was quite optimistic about reason and rationality in people. He thought they would beat religious fanaticism and superstitions. He seems to be a quite liberal man, but even he makes discriminatory remarks in the book. Well, you cannot blame him altogether because of those remarks, though. It's because of the time when he was alive. It's not always easy to decide what is right, and what is wrong. Different ideas are preferred, or thought to be true in different periods of time, and in different places. I wonder what would Voltaire say about the world today, if he was still alive. There are still many cases of murder under the name of God. Will humans ever find an answer or solution on this issue?

Now, let me write about something else from here. I am writing about how studying saved my life, and made me feel much better. The world today is obsessed with being, and staying happy and positive. It's like the world is telling me I shouldn't be sad. You should be happy, and you should strive for happiness; you live to be happy. But I can't really find my space in that kind of atmosphere. I am not a happy person. I have struggled because of that; I am not how I am supposed to be. I have always thought, "Why can't I feel happy and positive like everyone else?" But now, I know that I don't have to feel like I have to feel in a certain way.

If you have read my other posts, you know my mother was very strict. When I was a child, she didn't allow her children to have long hair. You know, long hair requires longer time for blow-drying, and you need to arrange it into different hairstyles. School teachers will not allow you to participate in physical education classes with your hair down. Basically, if you have long hair, you will need to take care of it. On the other hand, if you have short hair, you don't have to worry about any of those things. So my mother preferred the latter choice. Moreover, my mother was the one who cut my and my sister's hair. She was not a hairdresser, so we couldn't expect her to give us a cool, sophisticated hairstyle.

Nowadays, having short hair is cool. There are so many famous people with short hair. But when I was in elementary school, most girls had long hair. Not everyone had long hair like mermaids, but at least their hair was long enough to be tied with hair ties. So just having short hair would stand out. When I was in the fifth grade of elementary school, I was bullied. I had just transferred to a new school that April, and the kids there weren't really welcoming. Like I said, my short hair made me stand out even more, and I wasn't born with a feminine face. Kids at that time thought all girls had long hair, and short hair was for boys. So, it didn't took long until they started to make fun of me by calling me a boy.

It would have been much better if I had loved my short hair. But I did not like my short hair; I never did. I had always wanted long hair. I had always wanted to feel my hair on my back. But my mother never let me grow my hair. I couldn't go against my mother. So, things were much tougher. I was bullied for something I didn't intend. Even so, I couldn't tell me mother that I had been bullied at school. I would thought that she would get mad, and scold me for being bullied, and for being weak. I would do anything to avoid being scolded by my mother, so at home, I just kept shutting my mouth about the bullies.

I also thought that if I had been pretty, they would not have bullied me. I was never confident about how I look, and I this incident made me think that I was indeed ugly. I was bullied because I was ugly. That's what I had been thinking. At that time, I avoided people's eyes. I was afraid of them. I thought every single person who looked at me would think that I was ugly. Even if they didn't tell me so, I thought their eyes said so. If people near me were talking, and laughing, I thought they were talking about how ugly I was, and laughing at me. I know that was not true now, but at that time, I just thought so.

There are so many things I want to say to my mother. But I don't think I will ever tell any of them to her. I don't trust her. For me, there is no trust relationship between us. So many people say that their moms are their best friends. But I don't have that kind of feeling towards my mother. She was always a parent, not a friend of mine. She was the one who dictated me. I don't think she was a good mother, nor she was good at being a mother. She has abused me, and my sister. For me, it is really hard to say that I appreciate my mother. Yes, she has been working hard to pay my bills. She prepared food so that I could eat everyday. Oh, not everyday, to be honest. She would sometimes punish me and my sister by not letting us eat. Anyways, I know she worked hard, and nobody is perfect. Nobody can be a perfect mom all the time. But that doesn't mean I should overlook, and even understand all those abusive attitudes and behaviors of her towards her children altogether, I think. She never said sorry for those behaviors. I think she never will.

People seem to love their families. I know not everyone does, but those kinds of posts don't really show up, do they? I feel like everyone is supposed to love their families, and be vocal about that. I don't like my parents. I love my sister, so I won't say that I hate my family, but I don't like my parents. Children cannot pick their parents, and I was no exception. And I feel sorry for myself.

They say that I should thank my parents. Kids should thank their parents, they say. If you can't, that means you are a bad kid. Parents do make mistakes; their humans after all, and humans do make mistakes. But kids will understand eventually. That's what they say. I disagree. I am not obligated to understand my mother. I don't like this whole atmosphere that society has. Wrong things are wrong. I don't understand, and accept her abusive behaviors. And that's not because I am a bad kid.

I am not a bad kid. It's just I wasn't born in a good family. I wan't born in a family, where parents would listen to their children, and allow them to act, and say things freely. They wouldn't make their kids feel that they shouldn't tell what they really feel because that would upset their parents, and they will get scolded.

Studying philosophy has helped me a lot. Philosophy doubts everything. Philosophy takes nothing for granted. Philosophy has taught me I don't have to think in a certain way. Philosophy has taught me that it's totally fine to doubt things that the majority of people seem to think to be undoubtable and undeniable. I don't have to think in a certain way, and I don't have to think that I'm wrong, or I'm a bad person, because I cannot feel the same way as other people do. I am not a happy person, when people are supposed to strive for happiness. I am the queen of negative feelings! lol

And it's not just philosophy. Studying will show you that things are not always clear-cut, and it can be really hard to decide what is true, and what is not, or which choice among different choices is the best. I have learned this by taking classes at school, and also by reading books. I also have learned critical thinking. Thanks to what I have learned, I feel much better about myself. Your physical environment around you can be very small, but reading and studying have taught me that the world is big and wide, and that so many ideas have been presented. You don't have to agree with the majority, and you don't have to feel sorry for yourself for not being a part of the majority.

So... thank you, thank you, thank you for reading this post. If you made it this far, wow, you are a patient reader! lol No, I mean you are an amazing reader! I hope to see you in my next post. Till next time!

Wednesday, September 13, 2017

A Step towards Body Positivity!

Hello, hello! It's been a month since I last posted! I thought I could post more during the summer vacation, but it turned out that was not the case! Like I said in the post, I have been working as a translator (I'm not a pro, though...), and since I am not good at balancing out multiple projects that are going on simultaneously, I have been focusing more on translating, rather that writing my own sentences...

Oh, and I really want to take a moment to say that my heart is with all the people who are and have been affected by the hurricane. People's lives and their safety always come first. Japan is a country that is frequently affected by natural disasters, and I know how hard they are. Japanese media also report about the hurricane everyday, and I get nervous and sad to see the news every time. Science and technology have developed so much, but human beings are still vulnerable when these kinds of natural disasters occur. Please be safe; safety always comes first! Evacuate if you need to, evacuate before you hesitate, and evacuate even before you think whether you need to evacuate or not.

So I think I am going to talk about body positivity today. Do you love your body? Are you satisfied with how your body looks? When you look at your body in the mirror, can you say, "I look beautiful!"? Well, if every single person could answer "Yes," to this questions, the whole "Love Your Body" movement and that sort of things do not make any sense. There are so many people, including me, out there who have insecurities about their own bodies.

I think the motto, "Love Your Body" is awesome. Yes, we all want to love our bodies, and be confident. And yes, it would be so great if we could all love our bodies, and encourage others to do the same. But the problem is: it simply is not that easy!

First, how do we love our bodies? Or what does it meant to love our bodies? How can we love our bodies when we know our bodies are not perfect? How can we love our bodies when we are surrounded by images of perfect bodies through media? Do we all have to look like fashion models? Would we be happy if we were tall enough, skinny enough, etc., like fashion models? There comes so many questions, and I'm sure you can add more to this list with ease.

Let me talk about my body from here. I have always been a skinny girl. I'm just naturally skinny. I try to eat healthy most of the times, although I do get lazy from time to time. I have never been on a strict diet, and I never had to in the first place. I have been told so many times throughout my life that I was skinny. "Wow, you're so skinny! Tell me your diet!" "I wish I were skinny like you!" "You're so skinny, I'm jealous!" So then, it's so easy to love my body, right? But the answer is, no.

How tall am I? I'm 156 cm, or 5'1", depending on where you live. And how heavy am I? I weigh 41.4 kg, or 91.2 lbs, again, depending on where you live. As I said, I have told that I was skinny, and I think many people (still) associate being skinny with goodness. So I must be happy all the time, right? No, unfortunately. Actually, there are many times, so many times that I think that I am not skinny enough, or I am not that skinny.

Living in Japan, there is this atmosphere that skinny is healthy, pretty, and good. I guess many people tend to think consciously or subconsciously that people who are not skinny ("fat" people) are also lazy; they don't take care of their bodies properly. So, in order to look healthy, attractive, and responsible, one needs to be skinny, or skinny enough, at least.

If you go watch Japanese television, you will see so many scenes where "fat" people are made fun of openly. I see that in the U.S., or maybe other parts of the world, the model/beauty industry has started to accept more diversity, although there is still a plenty of room for improvement. Ashley Graham is a very good example of such kind. She is a beautiful lady with a strong will. She has continued to speak up about body positivity and to make the definition of beauty more diverse. All the Japanese models are skinny; I don't see any improvement of that sort here in Japan. I mean, you can be the front cover of a big magazine in Japan, even if you are "not skinny," but not as a model, or a representation of beauty.

Also, in Japan, where people value modesty, you can't really be like, "Yeah, I am skinny!" When someone told you, "You're so skinny!" to give you a compliment (Remember? Skinny is good!), the most appropriate answer would be: "Oh, no! I'm not that skinny! You're skinny too!" or "No, you're skinnier!" It's like a ritual. Oh, let's not debate about how this ritual is ridiculous, and meaningless. I know this communication isn't creating or offering anything new when you think that communication is for exchanging information and getting something new. If you think in this way, you could argue that this type of ritual dialog is meaningless. But it's not. Every culture has rituals in how they are supposed to communicate with each other, and human being communicate not just to exchange information, but also to have a smooth social relationship.

Ok, that was quite an excursion. So, in this modesty context, you are not supposed to admit that you're skinny openly unless you have a 100% perfect body like models. Japanese girls say that they want to lose weight when they clearly do not need to. I think by say so, they are showing that they are not being a snob, presenting that they know they are not enough. And being on a diet is an act of working towards goodness and attractiveness, it should be praised. I think that is what is going on here.

I feel awkward and even sad when people come to me and say, "You're skinny! I'm jealous!" because that means people think skinny is solely beautiful. That is just an illusion that our society has created! I don't want girls to think they need to be skinny, or even skinnier than they are now, even though they are already perfectly beautiful and healthy. I always feel like, "Well, thank you for the compliment! But please don't say you want to be like me, cause you are already perfectly fine!" And it's sometimes hard even for me to admit that I'm skinny! Sometimes, I feel like I need to think that I need to be skinnier, or I am still fat, because of the pressure that society creates, and the pressure that I create for myself.

If you had a skinny body like me, you would never feel insecure about your body? Hell no! I do think I am fat sometimes, to be honest. And let me tell you my biggest insecurity about my body: boobs! I happen to have small breasts. I mean, my chest is literally flat like a little kid. And I have always wanted bigger boobs because I feel that bigger boobs are sexier and more feminine. I have been made fun of both openly and subtly because of these small breasts. A douchebag who cheated on me in the past has told me, "Now I'm dating with a girl with big boobs, now that I have an experience with small boobs (= me)." I think this is part of the reason why I tend to think that all men love bouncy boobs and not mine. I never wear clothes with a low neckline because I'm just not confident enough to show my chest area, and want to hide them. I get nervous when I wear bikinis, because I feel like people would look at my body, and be judgmental about my breasts. So I always choose a design that would hide my breasts entirely, rather than the one that shows the shape of my breasts. When I see girls with outfits that show their cleavages, I can't stop being jealous at them, because that's something I can never do.

I think it's too hard for people with insecurities about their bodies to totally love their bodies instantly. People say things like, "Oh, stop comparing!" But it's not that easy! We see lots of people everyday; it's not like each one of us lives in a cave from the day of birth till the day when we die, alone. I think what is important is that more and more people talk about their bodies. It's really important to know that every single person has some kinds of insecurities about their bodies, and that there is no such thing as pure perfection. If you can think and truly know that everybody has flaws, you can start to feel that you are not alone. And that will lead you to cherish your body despite of your flaws.

Thanks for reading if you made this far! I hope to see you again soon :) Bye!

Saturday, August 12, 2017

What Have I Been up to Lately? Being a Bookworm!

Hello! I hope you all are having a great summer! Or winter, depending on where you live... So the summer vacation has begun! This one will be my last summer vacation I can have while I'm still a student, and I want to make it a good one, but so far, I haven't done anything summery this summer! Oh, I've had lots of beer, so maybe that counts as something summery. lol But I'm a true fan of beer, so I drink lots of beer even in winter! 

Anyways, stay safe and healthy, everyone! Drink lots of, lots of water, and stay hydrated! Drinking water is very important! My mom would always say that you have to drink water even before you feel you're thirsty. Feeling thirsty means that your body is already dehydrated, which is not a favorable thing to happen to your body. So you should make sure that you take in some water periodically, as well as when you're thirsty. 

And you that also applies when you are in an air-conditioned room. When you're outside, it's easy to remind yourself that you should drink lots of water, because it's hot outside, and you sweat a lot. But when you're in a comfortable, air-conditioned room, because of the comfortableness, it's easy to forget about keeping yourself hydrated. Actually, the air that air conditioners blows out is very dry, so it can make your body, and also skin dry. So, DRINK WATER! 

Lately, I've started to do something new: selling my English skills. No, that doesn't mean that I've been teaching English, if that was your guess. Actually, I've been working as an amateur translator! "Coconala" is the name of the app that I've been using, and you can use the app for both selling and buying skills. And there are many kinds of skills; it doesn't have to be just language skills. Some people sell their computer skills, and help people develop their webpages. Some people sell their skills to help people lose weight. Some people are good at graphic design, and create icons and logos for their customers. And of course, these skills aren't the only ones you can sell and buy. If you're interested, you should try the app! But I'm not sure if you can use or even download the app from overseas. If you live in Japan, you should be able to download and use the app, and if you live outside of Japan, you should check if you can use the app or not first. (Sorry!) 

As I've said, I'm selling my English skills, and since I started the app, I've got some customers who wanted their documents (e.g., contract, instruction, statement, thesis, etc.) written in English to be translated into Japanese, or vice versa. Translation is fun, but it can also be tough. When I'm reading English, I'm thinking with an English brain; when I'm reading Japanese, I'm thinking with a Japanese brain. This means that the ability to comprehend English sentences, and the ability to translate what I have understood in English into Japanese are distinct. If my task was just to read the document and understand the contents, it would me much easier and quicker, than having to translate it into another language. Translation takes a lot of time. But I'm not complaining. It's true that translation is very time-consuming, it can be hard sometimes, but overall, I like it. I am currently working on a long thesis (28 pages in total! ), and I won't take another order until I've finished it, but I'll start taking new orders from next month, so if you have any problems, go to my page at coconala! My name in coconala is: yesimyuki. 

I've been reading a lot of books this year, and here, I will list up some of the books I finished reading recently. 
  • Poor Folk by Dostoevsky
  • Brave New World by Aldous Huxley 
  • The Loved One by Evelyn Waugh 
  • Notes from Underground by Dostoevsky 
All of these aren't too long, so go pick of one, some, or even all of these at your local bookstore or library, if you're interested! 

"The Loved One" is the shortest one of the 4, and if you're looking for a good laugh (i.e., a sarcastic laugh! lol), that should be your first pick. The book was published in 1948, and the story is filled with irony on how America (at that time, from the view of the author) turns everything, like even funeral, into business, a man who is brilliant at work, but dominated by his mom at home where he lives with her, a poet who takes poems from books, and send them to the woman he likes as if he was the author of those poems, etc. I can't say too much here, can I? I don't want to disappoint you by giving out too much information. 

Other ones are awesome too, even though I'm not talking about their stories and stuff here. If you are skeptical about the idea that development in science and human rationality will bring a bright future, and that these 2 things are what we need to aim for, you would love the books. If you think modern humans should worship human bonds more, and if you have or still want to have hope in humanity, you should read them. If you think that struggles, suffering, and hardships are what make us stronger and human, go read the books to find out that you are not the only one to think so. 

I was especially impressed by "Notes from Underground" by Dostoevsky. It was published in 1864, but the message is terribly new. I was quite shocked by how well and accurately Dostoevsky foresaw the future (which is now present). You can also see this from reading Part 1. It is not a fun, cheerful book as you may have already guessed, but there's an extremely important message we all need to see in this book, and I highly recommend reading this book. 

The book I'm currently reading is called "Reveries of a Solitary Walker" by Jean-Jacques Rousseau, and it is also very interesting. I'm having lots of fun reading it. This is the first time for me to read a work by the famous French philosopher, Rousseau, and I'm hoping to get to know a little bit about him from this book. 

Alright, that's all for today's post! I need to go now to continues translating the thesis for my customer. Thank you for reading, and I hope to see you guys soon in my next post! 

Tuesday, July 18, 2017

So Long, Twitter and Instagram...

Hi, everyone! I hope you're all having a great summer! It's been very hot and humid here in Japan. I mean this is how summer is supposed to be in Japan, but every time the season comes in, I always think, "Jeez! This is the hottest summer I've ever had!" lol I've been trying not to used the AC so often to save money, and I always use a fan. But when it's too hot, that doesn't really help, because it's just a fan; it just blows out air, not a cool air, so it's still hot. During winter when it's cold, you can bundle yourself up with clothes. But when it's hot, you can't just do the opposite. Well, you can take off your coat, jacket, cardigan, etc., but you cannot take off everything. You cannot just walk out of your door without wearing anything. You still have to wear something. 

Oh, the problem is not just about the heat. Ok, so when you go outside during summer, you don't want to wear a lot. It's deadly hot outside, so just a T-shirt and short pants are more than enough. You walk to school, and yes, it's this temperature, so just a casual 15 to 20 minutes of walk makes you sweat like you've become a waterfall. You enter to the classroom, and you feel like you've come to the heaven, because it's an air-conditioned space, and you don't have to sweat anymore. But nothing is permanent, and the heaven does not last forever either. Now you start to feel cold. You feel cold because you are wearing the same clothes which you chose to wear for the hot temperature outside. And that outfit is not suited for sitting in an air-conditioned classroom for 90 minutes. After the class is over, you get out of the classroom, and the building; you feel even good to go into a much higher temperature. But then again, nothing lasts forever, and you eventually start to feel like you're dying because of the heat. This happens anywhere! When you get on a train, when you go into the library, when you are shopping at a mall, etc., you feel so comfortable at first, but then you start to have goose bumps on your arms. Oh, there's an exception: when I get home. It's really hot in my apartment, so when I get home, I don't feel comfortable at all. lol 

I wonder how it's like to live in the south hemisphere, where it's actually winter during the time when it's summer here. It's like, "What?! It's winter in your place when it hits the highest temperature of the year here, and you're sweating during the Christmas season?!" Actually, I've been to Australia once when I was little, but because I was little, I don't remember anything about the trip. How sad! I saw kangaroos, tried to feed them, but then I got scared when the kangaroos approached me to get food, and I started to cry. This is the story my parents tell. Oh, and because I was crying, my dad came to rescue me. But because he was in such a hurry, he accidentally stepped on one of the kangaroo's tail! Luckily, the kangaroo didn't care, and my dad wasn't hurt. 

Alright, so I am starting a whole new topic from here. I've deleted my Twitter and Instagram accounts. I don't have Snapchat, and what I have now is just this blog and Facebook. Why I deleted them? Because I knew that I didn't really need them, and I knew they weren't really beneficial for me. And they weren't making me happy. Well, in addition, I wanted to have lesser screen time. 

Modern people are so addicted to phones (or screens in general), that most of us pick up our phones when we don't really have any purpose to do so. It's not because your phone rang to let you know that you've got a message. It's not because you remembered that you had to send an e-mail to somebody. We do pick up our phones with a purpose in our minds, but there are so many times when we open our phones without any particular purpose. 

Why do we do this? I think we do so because our phones have got something, always. Think about Twitter and Instagram; they always show something new every time you open those apps. It doesn't how to be only about those apps. Any social media outlets, news feeds, online bulletin boards, etc., offer new stuff. Also, note that all those things are bottomless. You can just scroll down, and there is no point where you can no longer scroll down. That's why it's so easy to forget about time, and spend like an hour on the Internet. 

Even when we open our phones with a purpose on our minds, we tend to open social media apps after finishing our tasks, and before putting down our phones. It's almost an automatic behavior. 

And what do we get? Well, yes, we get information from those social media outlets. Those posts are information, those pictures are information, and those videos are information, too. But is it always good or fun to get new information? Are you even interested in all those information? More simply, are you having fun with what you're doing? 

I'm not hating the Internet and social media services altogether. What they can do is fascinating, and I know how they can be fun. But it is also true that we don't have to be connected all the time. When you scroll through your Twitter feeds or Instagram feeds, are you smiling? Or are you facing the screen with rather emotionless face? Some posts do actually make you have facial expressions, but I feel that most of the times, people are staring at their phones with a deadpan. 

People nowadays are distracted easily, and we are so impatient. We cannot wait even just for a minute. We loved to be stimulated. And smartphones offer anything so that we are always distracted and stimulated. 

Because of the Internet, we don't have to worry about time and space anymore. Thanks to the Internet, we can connect whenever we want, and from wherever you are. In this sense, we live in  a virtual. But isn't it also important to be aware of the present moment? Right here, and right now. Time is a pile of moments, and I want to live each moment with awareness. 

Alright, I'm off to dinner now. My sister called me while I was writing this post, so it took me longer than I had expected to finish up. I don't wanted to write and talk at the same time, since I cannot pay my full attention to both of the activities. I didn't want my sister to think that I wasn't really interested in having a conversation with her, and that I wasn't paying attention. So, we talked for about 90 minutes, and I got back to finish this up. My plan was to have dinner after I uploaded this post, and the dinner time is going to be later than I had originally planned, but that's just fine. I'm glad that she called me. 

Ok, so thank you for reading my post! I hope to you in my next post! Bye! 

Tuesday, July 4, 2017

Assessing the First Half of 2017! Have I Been Good?

Hi everyone! I just came here because I felt like writing some random things, even though I don't know what I wanted to write about. Well, but before we start, let me talk about how fast time flies! It's already July, which means that the first half of this year has already gone!

So many people make New Year's resolutions at the beginning of each year, but I feel like so many people don't even remember what their resolutions were by this time of the year. lol To be honest, I'm that kind of person. I remember thinking what I wanted to set as my goals of 2017 at the end of 2016, and I remember I did set my goals. But I don't remember what they were... So naturally, I have know clue whether I have been doing good or not, and I have no way to assess how far I've come, and set new smaller goals to achieve the resolutions. What about you? Do you remember your New Year's resolutions? Are you on a right track? Do you think you can achieve the goals? Or have you forgotten your resolutions like me? Or are you pretending like you've forgotten them? lol

Actually, I think I wrote my resolutions on Facebook. Haha, I know, I'm just an average person who writes "Happy New Year!" on Facebook, and continues to write what I'm looking forward to for the new year, and some resolutions. So, okay, I'll go check my Facebook, and see if I really wrote my resolutions for 2017 or not. ... Nope, I didn't write anything regarding goals for 2017. But I did remember right now that I wrote my resolutions on this very blog of mine! What?! How could I ever forget that?! Jeez, I am so bad! lol

Ok, so I just went back, and read the one of my old posts... I wrote an article titled, "New Year's Resolution!" on the 3rd of January this year. Yes, loud and clear; "New Year's Resolution!" lol And basically my goals for this year was (Note that I'm using the past tense, "was"!): to read more books that the year before, to get a job because I'm graduating next March, to study Eastern philosophy, and to help people be more confident of themselves.

Oh, alright... Okay. Now I can't pretend that I've forgotten all my resolutions, and therefore I don't have to work hard. lol Well, despite the fact that I have forgotten the goals that I set in January, I will look back on the past 6 months, and see if I'm doing good or not.

The first one: read more books that the previous year. Yay! I can say with a proud that I have been doing good on this one! Yes, I've read more than 10 books this year (about 15?), and will continue to keep reading more books, so it's easy to read more than I did last year. I didn't read many books last year, to be honest; I read about 10 books or so. I don't really know the exact number but definitely a little more than 10, but less than 15. By See? It's crystal clear that I will definitely break the record. By the way, the reason why I cannot give you the exact number is that I am not a good record keeper. I have a little note to keep the record of books I've read. But sometimes, I forget to renew it. So there should be some books I've read, but do not appear on my book journal.

I've been reading 3 books currently, which are "Magnetism" by F. Scott. Fitzgerald, "The Crime and Punishment" (vol. 3) by Fyodor Dostoyevsky, and "Naked Man: Digital's Invisible Dictatorship" by Marc Dugain and Christophe Labbé. The first one is a collection of some short love stories written by F. Scott Fitzgerald. The second one is... you know? It's famous. I've already read vol. 1&2, so I've moved on to read vol. 3 which is the last one. The third one is originally written in French. Oh no, I do not speak French. I am reading the Japanese translated version. I don't know if there's an English version of the book, so let me know if you know.

The next goal: get a job! Oops, nope, I have't accomplished this one yet. I'm still working on it.

The third one: study Eastern Philosophy. Oh, surprisingly, I can say, "Check!" on this one. I am taking a Zen class this semester, and learning about Buddhism and Zen. When I applied for this class in April, I had already forgotten about the resolution. But guess I'm lucky! lol And yes, I'm glad I took this class. I've learned things I didn't know, and it's the same as being able to look at a painting more deeply, or with different perspectives if you know some knowledge about the painter and the historical background of that period when the painter worked on the painting; now I have a little knowledge about Buddhism and Zen, and I can visit temples, and get more information out of it.

In the Zen class, we always practice meditation because meditation is the main emphasis on Zen school of Buddhism. You should not look for the enlightenment outside of your body; you should look within yourself. To go deeper and deeper in your mind, you meditate. Meditation is actually really hard. I mean if it was easy, everyone would be Buddhas. Making your mind empty is quite difficult. Try it for yourself. You'll soon know it's hard because your thoughts bubble up and float around on your mind constantly. Even thought the class will end this month, I will continue meditating, and perhaps I'll improve and learn something.

The last one: help people be more confident about themselves. Ouch. Well, even though I've made some positive comments about self-esteem on social media, but I have not made any systematic action towards this goal. As wrote in the "New Year's Resolution!" post, self-esteem is my personal issue as well. There are days when I think that I'm the ugliest, fattest, dumbest, etc., person on this whole planet. I see pictures of pretty girls on Instagram, and hate myself for not looking like them. But there are also days when I feel good about myself; I be me, and I enjoy it. I need to have more of this, and I want people to feel more of this as well. If we can stop comparing ourselves, we can be more confident. If we can learn that we don't have to be like other people, and we don't have to do or to be able to do the same things as other people, we can feel more comfortable with ourselves.

It's actually hard not to compare myself with people around me when we're all doing the job hunting. There are students who have finished job hunting already, which means that they've already got a job. Some students are still looking for a job even though they've got offers from different companies. Some students haven't got any offers, and still working on. We tend to have this equation on our minds that people who got a job early are winners of life, and people who haven't are losers. But you wouldn't know if you're the winner or the loser until the end of your life. Remember that.

It takes time to change how you see the world, and the change cannot be represented by numbers. So it's hard to evaluate how well I've done or how far I've reached. I do not know a perfect way to help people be more confident yet, but I need to try to do what I can do. I can write about it more on, for example, social media. I can treat people with positive attitudes, and compliment them as much as I can. You don't really talk so much about what you have on the deep place of your heart with random people or with your acquaintances, do you? I want to be a person whom people feel ok talking about those things to. I always wish that I had all the solutions for every problem people have. But I do not, and I just got to be kind and patient.

Ok, so that's all for today! Thank you for reading my post, even though this was a really personal one. I hope you all have the wonderful second half of 2017! See you till the next post!

Thursday, June 22, 2017

On Love and Tolerance, and on Hating the Vice, Not the Person...

Hi, everyone! I submitted my midterm paper for a philosophy class that I'm taking this semester today, and now I can say that I'm done with all the midterm stuff! Yes! And that is why I can have a time to sit down, and face my laptop like this right now. I don't have to feel like I need to study, and I don't have to feel guilty for not studying, and not banging my head again books and notebooks. Oh, I do love reading books, though. lol

So today, I am going to write about things that have been sitting on my mind for a while. It is about love and tolerance. Why have I come to think about these 2 things lately? Well, it's because I watched a YouTube video by Jeffree Star (I hope I spelled the name correctly!), and that made me think. I love watching his videos, and his works of art; I love watching him talking, and being who he is. I am subscribed to his channel, and have enjoyed following him on the Internet. I think he is so beautiful, and I also love his personality from what I can see through his videos. I have never met him in person, so obviously, I can't say I know everything about him, but at least to me, he seems to be really open-minded, honest, and nice.

Recently, he uploaded a video which is titled "racism" on his channel. In that video, Jeffree talks about his past and the mistakes that he has made along the way. He says that he had always struggled to find his place in the world, and that he had always harbored rage and anger because he couldn't find peace in his mind back in time. People would say the nastiest things to him, because he didn't look like most of us. And he acknowledges that there were times when he fought back with nasty words as well. He then continues to admit that it is wrong to fight back nasty words with a bunch other nasty words, but back in time, he knew nothing better. He says he wish he could erase and fix all those mistakes, but as you know, nobody can do anything about what has already happened. Although he had made mistakes, and flashed offensive remarks in the past, those things does not represent who he is now. He is very sorry for firing those words to people, and attacked people back. And he added that it's sad for him to see those clips from the past, and see people still use them to mock him, and to try to degrade him. Nobody's perfect, and we're all just a small human being at the end of the day, and he says that he knows that, and he's a person who tries to be better just like us. And he isn't the same person as he was 10 years ago, and he sends out a message that he wants to set an example, and wants people to learn from his mistakes.

So, that was what was said on his video, but what you read isn't what Jeffree exactly said. You got some bits of information about the video through my words, and that's not exactly the same as watching the video yourself. So go watch the video. It's always better to check out the source when you can.

Alright, so from this paragraph, I'll write about what I thought after watching the video. Here we go. You know, it's easy to love what you love. Love is easy when you are fond of the person, of the object, or even the idea. It's so easy to love the things that look pretty and beautiful in your eyes. But you cannot say that you know the truly meaning of love when you can only love things that you love. The true meaning of love lies in loving and showing respect to even the things you don't like. There are so many things, people, ideas, etc., in this world. And you don't have to like every single one of them. Of course, you can have your opinions. A thing is not for everyone. I always try to be open-minded as much as possible, but I cannot promise you that I am going to love everything. I can't agree with every opinion from every single person. It's okay to have an opinion, and dislike things. But things get pretty messy when you try to exclude things you don't like.

Sometimes you may bump into a person, an object, or an an idea that goes beyond your comprehension. I think LGBT or boys wearing makeup can be classified in this category (for some people). Please keep in mind that I love seeing boys wearing makeup, and I do follow male makeup artists on social media to see their amazing works. And although I am a straight girl who dates a boy, I am a supporter of the LGBT community. Nobody should be ashamed of who they are, and nobody should be judged by their sexuality. LGBT people aren't abnormal, and they're not sinners either. They're human beings who celebrate love like anyone else. In recent years, more and more people have become aware of the need to break boundaries, and we've witnessed some amazing progress. But things were not always like this in the past. The backlash against the LGBT community must have been much more severe. I think that it was hard (or even impossible) for people to understand the concept of LGBT back then, when all people were supposed to be heterosexual. But you need to know before hand that sometimes things that are beyond your comprehension happen or exist, and that's okay. It's easy to get scared of things you don't really understand. People feel uneasy when they cannot find a category for an object; people do not like uncertainty.

But even if you don't like a person, an object, or an idea, that person, that object, and that idea have a reason to exist. You may hate a particular person for some particular reasons. But you don't need to treat the person accordingly at all. You can still treat the person with respect, and acknowledge him/her as one of the members of the society, and as the same human being. And that's the definition of tolerance, isn't it? No, it's different from faking your emotion. If you think tolerance is about faking your emotions, and having to say that you like them when you feel the opposite, you haven't learned what tolerance actually is. Tolerance is about being okay with things you aren't really familiar with, accepting them, and acknowledge their full right to be there. Tolerance is not an emotion; it's a choice, and it is a will. Love can be the same too. Love is not just about loving the ones you love. Love is not just about loving the lovable aspects of a person, it's also about loving the person as a whole, including the flaws. Love is not just about loving a person when you want to; it's about keep working hard to strengthen the love and the bond between you and that person even during the hardest time. Love is not an emotion either; it is a will.

Ok, now let's talk about this: hate not the person but the vice. The next time you feel like trying to degrade and disgrace Jeffree, or any other people because of what they did in the past, try to think about this: do you want to do so because you hate the action, or because you hate the person? It should be hard initially, to draw the line between these, especially when you're the very person who was attacked and offended by the person in question. But eventually, you'll need to move on. It may be tough to hear this, but you cannot get satisfied by continuously blaming the person. I know it's not easy, but you need to try to blame the action instead, especially when the person is apologizing to you, and learning the lesson. You can't justify the act of firing racist words, but I think Jeffree should be also allowed to explain his circumstances, and defend himself. It's not fair to take out a bit of information without examining the whole context, and just blame him. And to all those people (most of whom do not even know Jeffree personally, I guess...) who talk and write shit about Jeffree, you do so not because you want to inform people, and to bring justice, but because you simply hate him, and you love humiliating him. You just love finding fault with him.

I love memes. They're mostly funny and enjoyable. But some of them are rather nasty and mean. When I first saw the meme that says something like, "If Donald Trump is drowning, would you save him?" I was shocked. I saw so many people commenting that they would not save him. This is disgusting. Some may say that they were saying no as a joke, but that joke is not funny at all. Well, I do not agree with what he says, and I'm not a hands-down Trump supporter. But if he was actually drowning, I would make an action to save him. Even if we may not agree with each other on different topics, he's a human being just like me. I mean, it doesn't have to be President Trump; it can be anyone. Those then-kids who bullied me...Yeah, I would save them. Why? Because I don't hate them anymore. I just hate what they did to me. It's impossible to forget how hurt I was back then, and what I had gone through in the past. I will never forget the pain and the loneliness that they made me feel. But that doesn't make me go and revenge on them. I won't justify their action, but I know how bullying works. I confess that it took a while to come to the state of mind where I am now. But eventually, I learned not to hate them but to hate the action. You should try to do the same. Hate not the person bu the vice.

So there you have it. This is what I have been thinking about lately. Oh, yes, I know. Nobody asked me to write these things, and like I said, I've never met Jeffree personally. And making this kind of post can be taken as interfering and nosy. But I love writing and writing helps my thoughts to be clearer and more organized than they're just floating around inside my head. And I just didn't like keeping my mouth shut when I have some words to say. I just didn't like to remain silent when I can see those mean tweets or comments directed to him. You can decide for yourself whether you like this post or not. Even if you dislike what I wrote, there's nothing I can do. I can offer, but I can't force you. And that's how things go. If you happened to stay with me till this moment, thank you for reading my post. English is my second language, so it must have been hard sometimes to make sense of what I wrote. lol Lastly, I want to thank Jeffree for letting us explore the world of makeup with you through your videos. And thank you for being honest and trying to be as open as possible to us. You are strong, and you will keep shining by being you. I will always be excited to get to know more about you, and hearing your words.

Thursday, June 15, 2017

Let's Exile Physical Punishment!

Hi, everyone! It's already the middle of June! The first half of 2017 is about to fly away! How's everyone been doing? As some of you might know, the rainy season has started in Japan. In Japan, June = the rainy season. But we haven't had much rain as far as I can remember! How weird is that?! lol Moreover, it is repeated again and again on the weather channels that the air is so dry! We're in the rainy season, but the air is dry? Like winter? How can this kind of thing even happen? I almost have no knowledge about the science of weather, so this is very mysterious to me. If anyone can explain what is going on, please do!

So, in this article, I am going to write about my past... My not-so-fun side of my past. And it is about my home that I grew up in. This can be a very personal post, and if you're not interested, I do understand that. But if you find this article worth reading somehow, then please keep reading! Thank you. 

My mom was (and perhaps still is?) very strict. Very strict. Yes, I understand why she had to be strict. Parents are not friends. And raising a child is not always easy, and can be pretty tough. You need your child to do things by themselves. The child needs to be able to live by his/herself in the future. The child needs to be a decent adult, and know what's right and wrong. The child needs to have self-discipline. The kid needs to study and learn things. Sometimes, the child has to go through hard times so that they can learn that working hard and being patient pay off. Yes, I understand all of these. 

But, kids, too, need a break from time to time. I wrote that parents aren't the friends of their kids. But sometimes, they need to be their friends. Well, I wished that my parents had been willing to be my friends sometimes, at least. They never were my friends. Even worse, I have never really trusted my parents. Yes, my parents did raise my up, and they are the ones who paid for all of the things I needed in my life, such as education. They fed me, secured a house that I can live in, worked hard to earn money so that I can go to school, etc. I know she has always wanted to do her best to raise me up, and wanted me to be the best that I can be. She was a perfectionist. Well, it's not totally a bad thing to be a perfectionist. But sometimes it can be a bad thing, especially when you're rubbing your version of perfection on your kids face, ignoring what they feel inside. 

When you're raising a child, you cannot just keep smiling all the time. You need to expose your scariest face sometimes, in order to let your child know that he/she is not supposed to do what they are doing. You need to scold your child sometimes, you know? Again, your child need to be a decent adult, and be independent in the future. And spoiling your child is not good for him/her. I mean, once in a while, you can spoil your child. Kids need that sometimes. Not just kids, we all need some treats after a hard work, right? Ok, so my point is, you shouldn't spoil your child too much because you don't want your child to be a spoiled child and a spoiled adult in the future. 

Scolding your child is necessary when your raising a child. But how you scold your child is very important. Long story short, this is where my mom failed. I was yelled at a lot by my mom. And there were many times when she beat me when I did something wrong (or when what I did didn't turned out as what she expected?). I was slapped, I was beaten, I was kicked, and the list goes long if I were to mention with what she beat me. I simply cannot write down all the reasons why she had to beat me because there are just so many. So... let me give you just one example. I remember it so clearly. My mom was really enthusiastic about education. How well her kids did in school really matter to her. Some parents do not even know what their kids' homework look like. But my mom wasn't satisfied by merely completing schoolwork and doing homework. So at home, I had to complete another curriculum at home. One of the things I had to do was the weekly kanji test. My mom would read out a sentence at a time, and what I had to do was to write the kanji in question. For me, confessing that I cannot write the correct kanji because I could not remember it was so scary. Why? Because she would get angry. And when she was in a bad temper, things got catastrophic. The memory starts with a scene where I am standing in a room in an apartment where I used to live when I was in elementary school, with my nose bleeding because my mom beat me. And I am crying so hard because it hurt a lot, not just physically, but also mentally. She got outrageous, and beat me that hard because I was doing good enough in the kanji test that day. Some blood dripped down from my nose to the tatami floor. My mom yelled again because I wasn't supposed to make a mess in the house. I was crying, and my nose was bleeding, and I covered my nose, hoping that it prevented the blood from dripping down to the floor, which didn't really help. I was nothing but the definition of miserable. I didn't know what to do or what I was supposed to do. And once again, my mom shouted, saying, "Go wash your face!" So I went to wash my face in the bathroom, put some tissues in my nose to stop the nosebleed, and went back to the room where my mom awaited. My notebook had got crumpled up because of my tears, and moreover, because my mom had beaten me with it. 

This is what I remember. And there are lots of episodes like this. Oh my gosh, I was beaten with so many things. We humans use tools, right? lol Anyways, seriously speaking, I never want any kids to go through such experiences like I had to go through. I am against physical punishment. No exception. It took a while until I realized and fully acknowledge that my mom was abusive. I had always avoid that the word "abusive," and chosen to say that my mom was strict. But being strict and being abusive are very different. Being strict doesn't mean you can beat your child in the name of education. My mom would always say, "If you can't understand it by hearing it, you have to be beaten;" "If you can't understand it by words, you're less than human; you're the same as farm animals;" "If I have to beat you to make you understand, then you're the same as a cattle or a pig!" And by saying so, she justified her violence towards me, until I started to think that I deserved to be beaten because I was a bad child.

Some of you may think and say, "Well, if your mom is abusive, why don't you tell somebody, and ask for help, then?" Like I said, I thought my mom had reasons to beat me, even though I did know at the same time that she was doing too much. To me, talking about it is almost the same thing as notifying people that I was a bad kid. And I didn't want to do that, of course, because obviously, that's embarrassing. Plus, I knew talking about the issue to other people wouldn't help. I knew my mom wouldn't change for other people's opinions. She has always believed that physical punishment is necessary. It's not like she loves and enjoys beating children, but she had to sometimes. She thinks physical punishment is unavoidable sometimes. And honestly, she has a tendency to get too emotional and overreact sometimes. I guess she was just not good at controlling her emotions, which still doesn't count as an excuse to beat her kids, though.

She has never apologized for hitting her kids. Not a single time. I have apologized to her so many times when she was hitting me. I just kept saying, and screaming, "I'm sorry." But that didn't stop her from beating me. She stopped beating me when she was done. It was like you can't control the weather. I had to wait until the storm goes away. And I know she never will apologize. She doesn't see any reason to apologize for.

Unfortunately, my mom is not the only one. There are still a constant number of people (mostly older generations) who thinks that physical punishment is sometimes necessary. In the old days in Japan, physical punishment were much more common. Even if you were slapped by your teacher at school during class, that was not really a surprise back then. The coach in a sports team would hit the members of the team in the name of coaching, and making the team stronger. Nowadays, younger generations do not like those "You can achieve anything if you have a tough spirit!" kind of beliefs, but the atmosphere of this belief was used to be stronger. Japanese education has changed, and nowadays, teachers do not hit their students. More and more people believe physical punishment is wrong and unethical. But what is sad is that there are still some teachers, sports team coaches, or educator in a broader sense, who are accused of using violence towards their students. From time to time, you see news about those sad events through media. But I think violence at home is less transparent from the outside than violence at school or workplace. And I believe that there are still many children who suffers from violence from their parents.

Violence at any place is bad, and need to be excluded. Violence does not teach any good lessons. Violence really gets in the way of building a trust-based relationship. My mom has been my mom for more than 24 years, but I still cannot trust her, and be open to her. I tend to hide my feelings in front of her. When a person was confronted with violence, fear dominates him/her, and he/she can no longer think. The person will learn he/she is not supposed to do certain things, not because it is a wrong thing to do, but because he/she will get punished. This is really important, and you'll see why by looking at this example: you shouldn't kill anybody because killing is bad, not because you'll be thrown into a jail if you kill somebody. Well, it doesn't have to be killing; it can be stealing, cheating, or any bad things. Thus, when fear dominates you, you stop learning things properly. Moreover, fear brings helplessness, and it suppress spontaneity. Spontaneity is what so special especially about children. Not only children, but also adults learn best when they are allowed to think freely. Interesting ideas come from spontaneity. When there is fear, we start to watcher over our actions and speeches. We start to behave based on fear. We refrain from speaking up, and try not to cause any "trouble" so that we don't have to be punished. This is what will happen to children surrounded by violence. They'll think they're bad children even if it's not true, and limit their actions in fear of punishment for a very long time.

As I said, it took a while until I acknowledge that my mom was abusive. I didn't talk about this issue to my friends or other adults, except for my boyfriend. He is the only person whom I have allowed to touch the deepest place in my heart. I told him my secret, and how I have been raised up in my family. His eyes were filled with tears, and he said, "I am very sorry for all those things you had to come through." And he also added that what my mom had done is wrong, and that I should never think myself as a bad kid. My mom wasn't being strict; she was being abusive.

I don't want anyone to experience that same thing as I did. I do not believe in physical punishment. And now that I have recognized that my mom was abusive, and that I was never a bad kid who deserved to be beaten, I have been able to be more vocal about my childhood. Never justify violence. Physical wounds may disappear, but mental wounds will never disappear; they'll stay as nasty scars forever. Let's put an end to physical punishment. 

Tuesday, May 16, 2017

A Negative Rambling...

Hello. I hope you're having a great day or week, life, whatever. lol Ugh, I really hate the fact that I haven't been able to come here so often compared to what my situation was a few months ago! I have been failing to upload even once a week, and I hate it. I don't really like being busy (I sometimes do... Only sometimes...), and I don't like people who almost brag about how busy they are either. What I'm trying to tell you though, is that I've been busy! So ironic.

Well, job hunting is supposed to be the time when you meet different people, get to know different industries/companies, search for your future career path (i.e., your "bright" future!), etc., and it should be uplifting. But I feel like I'm at the other end of the emotion scale; I'm depressed, basically. Other people may be imagining their future selves, and thinking how wonderful their lives can/will be. Joy of life? Not for me, really. I feel like my life is draining. Haha, that was kind of an exaggeration. 

Alright, today's post doesn't have any topic or theme or whatsoever. I just wanted to sit and write. ...Write about me being pessimistic. lol It's not like I'm sad; I'm just pessimistic. And being pessimistic and being sad are different. And I'm not mad or angry either. No, I don't feel anger. You could ask me if I'm happy. The answer is, to be honest, I don't know. I don't really know what happiness is, to begin with. If you cannot define happiness, then you cannot tell whether you're happy or not, right? I know, happiness is a state of mind, and everyone has their own definitions of happiness. Some people may define being rich, and having an abundance of money as happiness, whereas others may value different things. But in the first place, you cannot define happiness so easily. There are different and many factors that can affect happiness (e.g., money, human relationship, environment, etc.), and I think it's the combination of these various factors that people refer to when they try to define what happiness is. So, then, I guess that in a way, happiness is your life goal, and if your current situation is somewhat close to your life goal (i.e., what you want and what you want to be), then you're happy. 

Ok, now I'm going to make a new paragraph because nobody likes big, long and dull paragraphs. So, if you desire to know whether you're happy, you need to have a goal, at least. And I think I am having a (major) problem here. Currently, I don't have a goal. I'm not really sure what I want, what I want to achieve, what kind of person I want to be, etc. The more I learn, and the more I read, the more I'm confused. I want to reach out to the truth (if there's any), but it's like trying to catch smoke. I can't be sure about anything. 

Hmm, I guess I'll just stop writing here for today. My writing spirit(s) went away, and doesn't seem to come back anytime soon. Thanks for reading this depressing post if you happened to make it this far! See you next time! 

Friday, May 5, 2017

Animal Farm by George Orwell

Hi! It's been two weeks since I last posted... But this was not because I was busy, to be honest. I had much time especially the last weekend of April and the first few days of this month. But I had been out of my house, and spent time doing different things which aren't worth mentioning here. lol

To tell the truth, I am so glad that I didn't quite blogging. I say this because I'm really bad at keeping a journal. At first, I never fail to open my notebook at night, and write a few paragraphs or so, but unfortunately, this good habit doesn't live long in my life. I have tried to keep a journal several times throughout my short lifetime (It's an ongoing process, of course; I don't have any plan to pass away at this point.), but none of the trials ended successfully. Well, in the first place, think about it. I wouldn't have to have my own blog if I were a capable person who makes journal entry everyday. What I write here are merely my soliloquies. The only difference is that whether the writings are public or private.

Ok, so that was my casual talks before I get right into business. lol As it says on the title, I am going to talk about a book called "Animal Farm" which was written by George Orwell. Yes, it is a fairy story about animals on a farmland, and yes, it may sound like a happy, peaceful story, but it is not. Oh, before I go in, please just let me remind you that I will reveal the basic outline of this story. If you do not wish to know anything about the story line, I have to suggest you to stop reading this post. Alright, so I read a copy of the book published from Penguin Books, and on the back of the book, it says:
"When the downtrodden animals of Manor Farm overthrow their master Mr Jones and take over the farm themselves, they imagine it is the beginning of a life of freedom and plenty. But as a cunning, ruthless elite among them starts to take control, other animals find themselves hopelessly ensnared as one form of tyranny is gradually replaced by another. Orwell's chilling 'fairy story' is a timeless and devastating satire of idealism betrayed be power and corruption." 
Yup, that's how basically the story goes. The animals on the farm were living a miserable life, and that was Mr. Jones and all other humans' fault, they thought. Or at least some of them strongly felt that way. Others were just not clever enough to think critically, and process their opinions, or just weren't that interested or enthusiastic, but took part in the rebellion as a result. Humans have been dominating their life, abusing them, and exploiting them, and they have come to think that they didn't have to let it be that way. And that ended up being a rebellion against humanity, and the couple who owned the farm (Mr. & Mrs. Jones) were exiled from their own farm.

Soon after the rebellion, the farm seemed to won peace and freedom. But it wasn't long before one specie (i.e., pigs) started to take a lead of the entire animals. They were doing all the "brain-works" for the animals and for the farm, and didn't engage in labor as much as other animals did. And among the pigs, two leaders emerged: Napoleon and Snowball. The two was always disagreeing with each other on every discussion. And the rest of the animals were mostly not clever enough to think which side to take, and they seemed to go with the one who was present in front of them and speaking. When Snowball was presenting his opinions, they thought he had a better idea; when Napoleon was preaching to them, they thought they should agree with him over Snowball.

But on day, to their surprise, Snowball was exiled by Napoleon, and Napoleon have come to become the sole leader of Animal Farm. From that time on, whenever bad things happened, Napoleon claimed that Snowball was the mastermind. You wouldn't really know whether Napoleon was correct, and Snowball was actually the bad guy behind the scene, but the pigs always found ways to convince their comrades. And now you already see the way the rebellion is headed. Now it's hard to see the goals and ideals that animals had imagined before and at the beginning of the rebellion.

There was a set of rules which was called "The Seven Commandments," and it was supposed to function like a constitution. The commandments were set right after the rebellion, and those were the rules upon which all animals should live. But the commandments were "adjusted" whenever the pigs wanted to, and the adjustments were always done at night when the farm is asleep. For example, one of the rules was: "No animals shall kill any other animal." But one day, Napoleon massacred animals who planned to set up him or had thoughts of treason against him by secretly allying with Snowball, in front of all the other animals. The next morning when they saw the commandments, it read: "No animal shall kill any other animal without cause." Of course, the animals do feel like something has been changed (The commandments are written on the wall with a white paint, and can be read from a distance.), but one of the pigs named Squealer who is really good at giving speeches and convincing people to believe what he says, always made sure to convince the animals that they had false memories by asking them, "Are you REALLY sure you didn't memorized it wrong? Can you prove that it was different before?"

There were many times when the animals didn't get enough food because of the harsh weather. But Squealer always reported them that they were having more harvest and food than previous years, which false statistics, but the animals couldn't tell the the reports were false because they couldn't really prove it, and the pigs knew it. Even during the hardest season, when the animals was starving and hadn't had enough food, the pigs and the dogs (i.e., the guard of the pigs) had plenty of food to eat.

In the end, the pigs had become just like human being, the ones toward whom they had the greatest hatred. They started sleeping in bed, wearing clothes, and drinking alcohol just like humans. When the animals witnessed the pigs partying with humans, they now couldn't really tell which was which. ...And that's the end of the story.

The book was published in 1945, and Orwell wrote this story to tell people the real situation of Soviet Union after the Russian Revolution. I am glad that I read this book since it's very alarming. From the third person's viewpoint, it is always clear that the rebellion is starting to head to a weird and dangerous direction, but the animals do not have ways to stop that even if they noticed that something was wrong. For them, it is impossible to point out the problem with full sentences, and they don't even know when and why exactly the rebellion went wrong. It just happened, and they had already become just a small fraction of the entire system and the events. The books was published more than 70 years ago, but the it doesn't sound like an old story from the past, which is surprising and frightening. This can really happen! And it is an important thing to keep in mind. Totalitarianism is not the story of savage, inferior countries of the past or far away from yours. It could happen anywhere, and yes, even today. I feel like more and more people have become aware of this, and been feeling cautious about our societies due to the current political situations we face today.

Again, I am really glad that I got the chance to read the book. I wanted to write about Orwell's life, but I won't at least in this post since it would take up too much space, and it's actually impossible to sum up his life in just a few sentences. I will just say that he had an extraordinary life.

Thank you for reading, and I hope to see you in my next post! Bye!

Thursday, April 20, 2017

The Middle Way...

Hey, everyone! Seems like I can upload a new post once a week lately! I wish I could post twice a week, but I guess that's impossible for me at least for now... *sigh*

Alright. In this post, I am going to write about balance. Life (and all the facets of life) is all about balance (= moderation). Sounds so simple, doesn't it? But it's easier said than done actually, at least for me!

I am pretty bad at keeping a good, healthy balance in many aspects of my life. For example, I am a hard worker. It might sound strange to say something like this about myself, but I truly am. lol I don't try to find a way to look like I'm working hard when I'm just sabotaging. When I have a homework assignment to do, I really work hard on it. I don't write trashy papers. When I have to write a paper, I always do my best to write a good one, one that is interesting enough for the professor to read it. I would hate myself so much if I did try to write a boring one just to finish the paper more quickly so that I could free myself from the duty. Moreover, I don't want to waste the professor's time by forcing him to read my meaningless paper. Isn't it rude, don't you think?

I know, it's good to be hardworking; it should be encouraged. But sometimes, it gets too much and too intense. Sometimes (or more than sometimes...? lol), I even feel guilty about taking a break. I feel like I should be studying more, instead of watching Netflix (Oh, by the way, have you watched Iron Fist? I highly recommend it! If you haven't watched it, stop reading this blog, and go watch it right away! lol) or reading comic books even when I deserve a good break. There are other examples like this. When I assign myself a rule, say, "I am going to eat healthy," I need to eat 100% healthy 100% of the time. I would eat lots of vegetables, no junk foods, and I would not have snacks or desserts at all. I would be so strict to myself, and make myself suffer. I also tend to work too hard on my romantic relationship. I am a girlfriend to an amazing man, and I always want to be the perfect girlfriend. I force myself to be nice, kind, and pretty all the time, to cook a lot for him, to help him with his work, etc., and tend to wore myself out. But I can't do that permanently, and so, I sometimes "fail," which leads to self-hate. And when I feel depressed, both of us are unhappy.

So, the point I am making here is: being hardworking is good, but when you start to work hard too much, and work too hard, you start to suffocate yourself, and that's when things become problematic.

This semester, I am taking a class called "Japanese Thoughts and Religion," and in this class, we are learning about Buddhism, especially Zen. The semester just started this month, and we've had only 2 classes so far since the beginning of this semester, so I still have so much more to learn obviously, even though I have already learned new things. I hope I can share more by the time the semester ends in July!

In the last class, we briefly learned about Siddhartha Gautama (the Buddha, "the awakened one"), and his life. He was born in a royal family. After he was born, a holy man prophesied that he would either become a great king or a great monk. His father wanted his son to be a king just like himself, and decided that he would provide anything to keep his son in the palace. He thought, if his son is satisfied with his life in the palace, he would not be interested in the world outside of the palace (= the real world where people need to experience suffering sometimes, if not all the time).

But as you've probably guessed, he couldn't cover up the truth like that forever. Siddhartha Gautama became interested in what and how would the world outside of the palace be like, and one day, he got a chance to get out of the palace, and see the real world for himself. Of course, he was shocked to see how the real world looked like. He had never suffered; everything in the palace was so beautiful. Everyone in the palace was young, healthy, and beautiful. He encountered old people, ill people, and also dead people for the first time in his life. He returned to the palace, but his life in the palace wasn't the same anymore. He decided to leave the palace to go on a journey to find the truth, and did so when he was 29, leaving his duty as the price, and the future king, his wife, and his new born child behind.

This is the story that I heard in the class (I heard the same story in another class that I took last year.) of the life of Siddhartha Gautama before he started his journey to the enlightenment. And from that time, it took 6 years for him to achieve the enlightenment (= nirvana). First, he tried to achieve the enlightenment (= to be released from suffering, because according to him, life is suffering) through tough training which made him suffer physically, such as starving himself for days. But it didn't bring him any good outcome, and he wasn't satisfied. It didn't work. And one day, he realized that he didn't have to choose the extreme way; he could choose the middle way. I had to go through this part rather quickly and briefly because I do not know much in details yet... Sorry.

Too less is not good, too much is not good either. The moderate amount is always good. And this principle applies to everything. I know this principle, and I understand what this principle means. But for me, it's not so easy to practice it in my everyday life. If I wish to release myself from suffering (because I am suffering from doing too much!), however, I need to practice it, and learn to balance myself. It took Buddha 6 years to learn that it's all about the balance, and I'm wondering how many years it'll take for me to learn that. Definitely more than 6 years! lol

I hope you enjoyed the little story about Buddha. Try not to push yourself too much! Keep in mind: a good moderation is the key! See you in my next post!

Thursday, April 13, 2017

Excuse My Complaining! :P

Hello! I hope you all are doing well! I just got back to school this week, and so far, all the classes I am taking this semester seem exciting and interesting! I do see that I am going to be very busy with schoolwork, but it's going to be so much fun, and I'm happy to think that I'll have learned lots of things at the end of this semester. 

Ugh, but it sucks that I will definitely have to miss some classes because of the notorious job hunting! I see a major contradiction here. We're students, right? As students, our first priority should be school, classes, and studying. Why do we have to miss a class to be at a particular place at a particular time for a job interview? This is so strange. If all companies do job interviews on weekends, that really helps! But most companies don't... Well, you can tell the interviewer (the company you're applying for) that you won't be able to come because you have a class, but the company would simply reply, "Oh, we're sorry, but we need you to come here like any other candidates." *sigh* In my opinion, students and companies should be equal. Job hunting should not be just about us students seeking opportunities. It should also be about companies seeking good human resources. Job hunting should not be just about us students go meet companies, and plead. "Pick me! Pick me!" It should also be about companies approaching students they want. "Pick us! Please join our company!" 

So, all the companies out there! If you really care about students (aka your future or potential candidates), you'd better be more flexible! Your job interview dates should be negotiable! Let students be students, and let students do what students are supposed to do while they're students. What's normal isn't always the best, and by the same token, what many people do isn't always the right thing to do. I mean seriously, missing even one class really hurts. Professors and lecturers understand that students have this issue, and many of them kindly excuse our absences when we have to miss their classes because of job-hunting related events. So, we may not lose our attendance points. BUT. You cannot listen to the lecture if you don't show up. And I don't like that. I would always want to listen to lectures directly by myself, and take notes directly from what I heard in lectures. That's the point of lectures and schools in general in the first place, isn't it? What's the point of showing up to lectures and school if you can just pass the class by getting copies of your friends' notes? I go to classes because I want to learn. I want to listen to what lecturers are saying, and interpret what they are saying by myself. Borrowing my friends' notes isn't the same as listening to lectures myself. 

Alright, so... since this post came to be about complaining, let me complain about one more thing. lol Some students just cannot shut their mouths even during classes! This phenomenon tends to happen more frequently in large classes. And those who do not keep their mouths shut tend to sit not near, but far from the lecturer. Well, first of all, how disrespectful! They're being so rude to the person who's speaking. I mean, how would you feel if people are paying no attention or whatsoever to you, and talking with each other about things that are completely unrelated to what you're talking about when you're standing in front of the class doing a presentation? That's not very comfortable, isn't it? Then why do you dare to do that to other people? Please think. PLEASE. 

Moreover, those noisy people are violating other people's right to listen to the lecture. You may think you and your friend(s) are more like whispering to each other than talking. But in almost all cases, you're not the only ones who are doing that, and believing the same damn thing. Students who are actually listening to the lecture feel noisiness behind them because there are lots of whispering going on simultaneously. And we who take classes seriously really dislike those disrespects to classes, lecturers, and learning. A classroom should be a sacred place devoted for learning and motivation to learning. It should not be violated by those noisy, immature students. 

We're collage students; we're all at least 18 years old or older (because you can't skip grades in Japan). And lecturers still have to ask the class to be quiet. They should be ashamed of themselves. And really, nobody's asking you to participate. You can decide by yourself and for yourself whether you want to be in the classroom or not. So, if you want to keep talking with your friends, just leave. Go elsewhere. Go to the cafeteria. And talk as much as you want. I mean, you're so uncool because you aren't cool enough to work hard on your schoolwork, and you don't have the guts to not showing up to classes at all either. So, make up your minds, please! I'm tired of having to be irritated by this problem. Don't be an adult who really is just a baby with a body of an adult. 

Friday, April 7, 2017

Can't We Have Peace?

Hi, everyone! It's been a while since I last uploaded a post. To be honest, I haven't been able to have time to sit down alone in front of my laptop to write a post because I had been with people a lot this week. My sister visited me, and stayed at my place this week, which was so much fun, and also, I was at my boyfriend's place for the past few days. It's been a while since last time when I was at my house alone actually!

Oh, by the way, it's the cherry blossom season again in Japan! This spring, it came a little late that usual, but I was lucky enough to have a full day to walk around, and see those beautiful pink flowers since the school hasn't started yet. It actually started today, but I don't have any class on Fridays this semester, so basically, I am going back to school from Monday next week! I am so excited about my new classes because I am mostly taking the ones that I really don't have to. I am almost done with all my required classes for my major, which means that I can take extra classes because I have more time than previous years, when I had to spend my time taking required classes. I am so hyped up!

Ok, so this time, I am going to talk about a sad thing that happened recently. And I am so sad that I have to talk about this. Because... seriously, when we can say that we have a peaceful world? We human beings have had two major wars. But sadly, it seems like those aren't enough for us to really learn that we shouldn't rely on violence anymore. I feel like people want peace, but not many people actually believe that we can really achieve that with everyone working together. People want peace, but they think that's too difficult and complicated. Or maybe they think there's no such thing as peace. They may think that they want to have faith in people and people's good will, but too many times their hope has been betrayed.

I was watching a news program the other day, and when I heard this, I was speechless... because I was so shocked to hear the news. Japanese government said that it would not participate in the negotiations on a treaty to ban nuclear weapon. I will link an article from The Japan Times, so that you can read it. I was shocked because Japan should be willing to talk about this. Japan is the only country that have suffered from attacks using nuclear weapons. We should be the first country to raise our hands, and say, "Hey, we should work together to make a better world." I see that Japanese government is making a political move. They stepped out of the negotiations because Japan is "under the U.S. nuclear umbrella," as it says on the article from The Japan Times. Japan can't really say the world doesn't need nuclear weapons, huh? This is really frustrating. I think those people who actually was there in 1945, and experience all the damage and sorrow brought by nuclear weapons are also frustrated.

I know we can't just say, "Alright, so all kinds of nuclear weapons are banned from tomorrow, so let's just dump all the things we have now." We need a steady plan, and follow it step by step. But rather just trying to find a way to achieve the world without any nuclear threat, Japan just simply stepped out. Easy as it is.

I mean... what are we doing?! Is this the peace we want? Maybe it's the peace we deserve. "Haha! We have this deadly weapon here! You see that? You know what? This one can be really bad! You don't wanna see me fire this, do you? No, you don't. And we don't wanna do that either. Alright, so we don't fight." So we live in a peaceful world where people still need to fear somebody may fire nuclear weapons someday. Is this peace? Are we happy?

I feel like this is the same as gun control. People always say, "But what if...?" "But how would you protect yourself and your family when things happened?" So, maybe we want to, but apparently, we don't believe in the theory of innate goodness of human beings. We have been living on the peace based upon the idea that we human beings are fundamentally and inherently evil.

Well, living in Japan is easy in terms of not having to live with fear of civil wars or bombings from foreign countries. But in many places around the world, people have to and forced to live with fear. I see innocent people getting injured, being killed, crying, and suffering on the television, and it hurts to watch those pictures. I can't stop myself from crying. I want to switch to different channels, but I always don't because for those people, that's the reality they cannot escape from. And then I get angry at myself for enjoying this ordinary life. And... our leader announced that they were refraining from talking about the treaty to ban nuclear weapons? I am so ashamed.

The world free of nuclear weapons might sound crazy in this world with nuclear weapons. But you can't make things come true if don't believe you can. I don't have any kids yet, but when I do in the future, I want to tell them people can have a peaceful world with confidence. I don't want to feel like I'm lying to them. I don't want to tell them we can't have a peaceful world because we're all too scared. I don't want to tell them it's better to be armed than to have faith in humanity.

I know this is a complicated, difficult issue. But we all want peace. It's simple; we all want peace. Can't we have it?

Reference:

  • A treaty to ban nuclear weapons. (2017, April 1). Retrieved April 7, 2017, from http://www.japantimes.co.jp/opinion/2017/04/01/editorials/treaty-ban-nuclear-weapons/#.WOd5zoiGNPY 

Wednesday, March 29, 2017

Business for Punks!!!!! (A Book Written by a BrewDog Founder!)

Hi! This time, I want to introduce a book that I have recently finished reading. I mentioned the book in my earlier post, but at that time, I could not fully talk about it because I hadn't finished it at that time. But now I have! Yes! For a non-native speaker of English, it is actually an accomplishment to be able to say that I have read a whole book written entirely in English. And it's not a skinny book for beginners, you know? There's nothing wrong with skinny books for beginners and people who read those kinds of books, by the way! But finishing an English book which is read not by English learners like me, but also native (and mature) English speakers is making me feel so good about myself.

Ok, now let's move on to really talk about the book... The book is called, "Business for Punks," and it also has a subtitle which says, "Break All the Rules - The BrewDog Way." The author of this book is James Watt, and he is a co-founder of BrewDog. And yes, BrewDog is a brewery, and it was found in Scotland in 2007.

Now, let me talk about how I came to pick up this book in the school library. In order to get to this, I should first talk about how I was introduced to BrewDog and their one of their products. It was on Christmas Day last year that I tried Punk IPA for the first time ever. Before that, I had never heard of the company or their products, to be honest, which now I think was a total shame. My boyfriend and I went into a so-called "British pub" which was newly opened in his neighbour. We both love drinking, so you know, a new place to have drinks, and we needed to check that out. So, we went there, and on the menu, I found a beer called Punk IPA, and it really dragged my attention. It looked like it had a cool label on it, I am a beer lover, and I love punk in the first place. I love punk music, and punk spirit in general. So, it was natural that I ordered it, and gave it a shot. I have made lots of mistakes in my life, but sometimes, surely, I do make great choices. I didn't have lots of information about the beer; I didn't know about the company, and I had not idea how the beer would taste like. But oh my gosh, it was delicious!!! I had not had a beer which had a taste like Punk IPA! It was very hoppy, and... just so good! (I am so sorry, I am really bad at describing tastes...) I knew that I would come back to the store for that beer from the moment that I had the first sip. It was that good! I looked up "BrewDog" on Google, and found some information about the revolutionary brewery. You won't be bothered to look up online to gather some information about the product you just happned to encounter, or the company whose making it, unless you're interested in them so much, right? So... yeah, that was how I came to know BrewDog and Punk IPA.

Then, how did I find the book? To be honest, that was nothing but a coincidence. As I entered the school library on the third of February (I know the exact date because I tweeted a photo of the book on the day I encountered it. lol), I caught something blue, which seemed to me was similar to the shade of the label of Punk IPA, in the corner of my eye at the bookshelf next to the entrance. I looked back. And it was actually a book written by a co-founder of BrewDog! I don't know why this happened, though. I mean, why would I know why it happened?! lol I didn't know James had written a book on his business philosophy, and the school library does not know about me, and what I'm interested in obviously! But thank... Umm, I don't know whom I should be thankful for... lol But uh... thank you, whoever up there, and have a control over destiny or whatever you call it for letting me discover this book!

Alright, so if you think my personal anecdote is so boring, I have a good news for you! All the rumbling is finally over, and now it's time to go over the core messages which James is telling to the readers. I can't just go one by one, of course, so I'll do what I can do to introduce (only) a few of the essence of his words of wisdom.

First, he teaches us that we shouldn't be starting a new business. Instead, we should start a revolution, or "crusade" in his word. It's about your passion, mission, and how you want to make a change in this world, rather than creating a mean to get profits, and earn money.
"Businesses fail. Businesses die. Businesses fade into oblivion. 
 Revolution never die.
 So start a revolution, not a business."
I am not a specialist in business, nor do I have a plan to start a new business, but I can't agree with this enough. Some people say they want to start a business, own a company, and so on. Ok, I get it... if you're like 5 years old. But they're actually much older than that. They want their companies, but they have no idea or mission. I have been pointing out that that is not how it works, and how you start a project, but now I can verify what I am saying even more because of, and thanks to this book.

Second, James talks also about the importance of founding your brand, and creating your fandom (i.e., marketing). When you buy a product, it's not just about the product, right? The image of the brand that makes the product always follows. You buy a product not because it has a good quality, but also you support that brand. People love brands that they feel they can relate to, and people love brands that are engaging, and willing to be open, and close to them. If a company has a clear, straight passion, mission, and philosophy, they will build fandom. And fans want to support the company and the brand. They will proudly buy, and use the companies products, talk about them online, which is a good way of spreading your brand and products without having to pay a lot of money. If you have a clear vision, good product, and a well-established brand, each fan of you will automatically be ambassadors.
"By engaging and connecting with consumers, you can recruit them to your crusade. By properly laying the foundations, they become actively complicit in your mission, and in turn help you succeed." 
"Customers want to buy into a business that they can believe in; they want to buy from a business that bleeds, loves and laughs in the same way they do and that stands for the same things to boot."
As I mentioned in my earlier post, I love wearing makeup. And I feel like I see many cosmetics brands are following this rule. Customers are fans for each brand. They are not just looking for good mascaras, brow products, etc. They want products that have that logo they love on them. They don't just trust the products; they also trust the brand. And when a brand launches a new product, the loyal fans are waiting, and craving to get one. Ok, so I just wrote about cosmetics industry, but you can do (or should be doing, I should say!) the same thing in every business.

And lastly, James tells us that if you're ever thinking of starting a business on your own, you need to be goddamn strong. And this means you need to take risks, be selfish, and be unreasonable sometimes to protect your mission and passion.
"On many occasions you are going to have to be ruthless, brutal, cold-blooded and cynical. This is OK. As long as it is done for the long-term good of what you are trying to achieve." 
"I love ignoring advice as much as every stupid muppet loves giving it to me. My advice, to those seeking advice, is don't even bother. Advice is for freaks and clowns. The thing about being driven is you need to know your own way." 
James says that everything you do needs to be motivated, and backed up by your mission. People will come up, and try to give you advice. But they don't know share the same passion and mission as you do, they don't really care about your company, and they're not going to take any responsibility if something (bad) happened to your company because you followed that piece of advice. But you care about your company because your life depends on it, you are going to have to take responsibility for anything that happens to your company, and you have the passion and mission. So, you should go, and do whatever what you believe in. Never try to please everyone. Stick to your mission, have faith, and work hard. That's what James is saying.

Alright! I won't give away too much information about what is written in the book, so if you want to find out more, you need to go get that book yourself. I actually want to say more to be honest, though! lol But before I start leaking more information, I probably finish this post. I really, truly enjoyed this book. My heart was pounding when I was reading this book! For real. My inner... uh, no, I think I am openly punk... Whatever. My punk spirit was very satisfied. And guess what? This book made me love BrewDog even more! I am being loyal, and I am actually writing about the company and their product on the Internet, so this is marketing too, right? lol

Ok, thank you for reading, guys! I hope I see you in my next post!